Why do you keep lying to yourself?

Why abstain from something that you desire so badly? Why hate yourself so much that you would prevent yourself from going for the things that you desire the most? Why would you risk losing your first-come, first-served spot to the endless attention that would come on me for simply following and being me? Im not threatened by power..I’m yet to see it. I’d love to see it, not going to lie my fetish is to see people in their empowered state. Courageous. Bold. Assertive. Confident. Goes fow what they want, yet it must be real, not a play. I’d love to see a woman i.e. in her element speaking her mind,, whether I like it or no,t straight to my face. Some have tried, not many kept it up.

I know what I’m working towards. I know what I’m fighting for, and I know where I’m headed. So my future is inevitable when it comes to where my path is at now. Which means that to whoever has been involved now, what I see is self-sabotaging towards something that you really, really, really want — because I can see the desire. I can see it through my five senses and feel the desire through my sixth sense.

It keeps showing up in so many different ways, shapes, and forms.

Yet that feeling within you keeps denying the desire — because acknowledging and accepting it would mean recognizing, reconciling, and reintegrating yourselves with your own emotions. The ones you’ve put aside just to experience this illusion of control. The experience of being in control of your feelings.

And that’s because I make you feel not in control. I know that’s how Consciousness has me.. in a chokehold. So I know the mirror

Which is perfectly fine. That’s what strong emotion is. It’s leaning into it. It’s allowing yourself the experience of it. It’s fighting for what you want and deserve and desire.

But at the same time… why would you?

It’s rhetorical. The answer is already known. You do not want to accept it. You do not want to accept the fact that you want me so much — because I bring life to you. I bring life to your life. I bring excitement. I bring adventure. I bring expansion. I bring everything you’ve wished for.

I just bring it in a package you don’t necessarily like, prefer, or thought possible. A package you fear will make you lose yourself because of how big it is.

I know that I’m expansive. That doesn’t mean I’m ungrounded. And because of that groundedness, I can reflect it back to you. I can put you in your place while elevating your place. I know you. I know you would rather grow, expand, be better, learn more, do more, be more of use — just like anyone else.

I know you want me that bad.

And you are only hurting yourself by not allowing yourself the experience.

It’s an eventuality. It’s simply a waiting game. Whether my circumstances change or yours do, the truth will come out. And the longer you wait, the longer you’ll have to reconcile with what you denied. The more you’ll have to look back on.

There’s no need for that.

You’re hoping I don’t get attention — because the moment I do, you know it will stick. You’re hoping I don’t get seen, because the moment I get seen seen — which means attention — you’ll feel competition for it. You’ll want a stake in the attention I reflect back.

You want my attention.
You want my desire.
You want my validation.
You want my love.
You want my compassion.
You want my time.
You want my emotions.
You want my mind.
You want me.

I know it.

You’ve told me in so many different ways without ever saying the words. Across years and years and years. Days and days and days. Months and months and months.

And that’s perfectly fine. It’s perfectly human. It’s perfectly conscious. It’s perfectly universal.

What you do with that desire is what makes you you. It shapes your character. It reveals the character you choose to be, to act as, to channel, to experience.

Don’t hurt yourself this way. You deserve better than hurting yourself this way.

You deserve to risk for what you want. Risk rejection. Risk no’s. Risk losing. But not trying?

Not trying out of defiance — that leads nowhere. If not regret, then something very close to it.

And not many people can endure that kind of bargain.

Because I see where things are going for me. I know you will have to face the fact that I will be in your face a lot — because I will be in the face of many. And that means you’ll be reminded of how you denied yourself the experience of being part of the first wave.

That is unfortunate.

All the could-haves that didn’t happen. The timelines that could have aligned if you had simply leaned in. Tried your best. God knows you might have matched her.

But not trying?

That is a hard pill to swallow.

We’ve seen it before — with those who later became celebrities, with those who stood at the edge of something before it expanded. There are always the ones who wish they had done more. Wish they had sustained it. Wish they had allowed themselves to be part of what could have been part of their life.

You don’t have to be that story.

But that choice isn’t mine.