Inspired by Amanda’s insight in “You have hard core spirit guides & an impenetrable spiritual force field…you won’t be stopped.”
There’s a moment in Amanda’s video that etched itself into my spirit like a truth I already knew but had never named.
She describes a figure—one we all embody at some stage of our lives—gripping an orange ball and launching it at a wall over and over, desperate to break through. The wall doesn’t budge. Not an inch. The ball comes back, again and again, and the figure grows frustrated, convinced the solution lies in more effort, more force, more precision. Still, the wall doesn’t break.
Eventually, in a final wave of fury or despair, the figure squeezes the ball until it bursts in their own hands—cutting them deeply.
That image stopped me.
Not because it was unfamiliar, but because it was too familiar.
The Ball Will Break Either Way
Here’s what struck me most: whether it exploded against the wall or exploded in their hands—the ball was always going to break.
And that’s the great paradox of self-sabotage and projected blame.
When we feel blocked or limited, we look for something to change out there. We treat resistance as something to overcome, and often, we unconsciously convince ourselves that destruction is the path to breakthrough. That if we just hurt it first, it won’t hurt us later. If we can’t win against the wall, then maybe we can win against ourselves. Or someone else. Or the thing we once loved.
But what if the wall was never the enemy?
What if the pressure building wasn’t a punishment—but a process of becoming?
The Illusion of Hurting First
When we choose to squeeze the ball and break it in our hands, we’re projecting pain outward in a desperate attempt to reclaim control.
To feel like we’re doing something. To avoid the vulnerability of surrender. To avoid being “wrong.”
But all we do is create another wound.
We become both the saboteur and the one who bleeds.
It’s the same illusion that’s echoed through cycles of violence, heartbreak, power struggles, and generational trauma. The same illusion that says, If I can’t win the way I want, I’ll make something else lose with me.
But the truth is, growth will still happen. The lesson will still land. The ball will still break.
The only question is: how do we want to meet that moment?
With fear and resistance?
Or with reverence for the transformation that’s already underway?
Jesus & The Willing Body
I then go on to say something profound: this figure isn’t evil. It’s not “bad.” It’s just unwise. And with wisdom, it too gets to ascend.
Just like Jesus offered his body not in defeat, but in devotion—so too are we invited to surrender the parts of us that cling, rage, fight, and squeeze. Not because they are shameful, but because they are done.
This is the mystery of ascension: we don’t evolve despite our wounds—we evolve through them.
The ego doesn’t dissolve through judgment—it dissolves through light.
Choosing the Sacred Break
When we understand the inevitability of growth, we stop making enemies of the process.
We stop blaming the wall.
We stop punishing the ball.
We start asking better questions.
- What in me is afraid of what’s on the other side?
- What am I trying to prove by hurting myself first?
- What would it mean to trust the wall was never meant to fall?
Because sometimes, the wall isn’t an obstacle—it’s a boundary.
Sometimes, the ball breaking isn’t a tragedy—it’s a release.
And sometimes, self-sabotage is just a soul’s cry for help from a part of us that forgot it’s already loved.
Final Thought: Your Guides Are Unshakable
Amanda reminds us throughout the video: You are surrounded by forces that will not let you fail.
Even when you spiral. Even when you squeeze the ball too tight. Even when you bleed.
You are still becoming. You are still on time. You are still guided.
And no matter what—
The ball will break in service to your awakening.
So the question isn’t: How do I stop the break?
It’s: How can I meet the break with grace?
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